It is inevitable as you age you’ve done your share of stupid things, sometimes knowingly sometimes not. You may have gotten involved with people who on some level you realized you should have never been with and the relationship and you’re deeply wounded. Or maybe you said, did, or didn’t do something that caused a special relationship to fracture, to not get that dream job, or never develop a talent you wish you really had. These events do not need to leave you with a feeling of being flawed for life. You can take these tears of the past and turn them into happiness.
Events like these can leave a wake of pain, regret and long nights of asking why. It is inevitable that we all will do stupid things, but living is all about learning, and learning is often painful. Our mind, heart and spirit can become ragged and full of metaphorical holes. Remember, once you’ve broken a negative cycle you are in control of what you do after.
Some will take their fractured souls and choose to become bitter and closed off. Others may choose to learn that people are awful and cultivate prejudice and spite to try to take revenge on the world. They justify their hateful acts because others have done it to them, and isn’t it only fair they say. These people continue the cycles of pain, spreading it like poison. But it doesn’t have to be like that. Holes can make us holy.
Be realizing that everyone makes mistakes, and then by taking responsibility for our role in what happened we can choose to grow better, stronger and more beautiful in heart, mind and spirit.
That spirit crack caused by bullying that happened in school may seem to never go away. There may always be that nagging sense of what if I’m not good enough? Take that experience and realize that you don’t need to believe everything people say to you. Know that just because someone says something does not mean it is right. You have learned what it is like to be cut down and be careful with your words so you don’t cause others the same pain. Empathy is developed when you learn to put yourself in the place of others. Compassion can be fueled by empathy.
Look at the beauty that can be unveiled because of the holes within you. You can become a brighter light to the world because of your holes. Take the dark night of the soul nights and gather the stars. Let them heal you and guide you to a beautiful place.
When you allow the light to shine out from your holes, you shine light on others who are suffering. You become the example that shows pain does not need to spoil your life forever. That it does end. You become a beacon for others lost in the storm. Light from one person, like the light of a single candle, can be spread to many.